I’ve been contemplating dating again. It will be first time I’ve dated sober. In the past, a standard date was a drink in the pub, usually followed up with drunken sex and a morning after of half remembered embarrassment. I’ve slept with people I don’t like, whose names I don’t know, and who don’t deserve me. My self esteem when I drank was rock bottom and any attention, even negative, was at least attention.
So this time around, as I consider stepping into that, frankly terrifying, realm of dating again, I am the most confident within myself that I have been and I have no desire to allow anyone into my life who doesn’t deserve me. I know that I will remember my dates, I won’t say things I don’t mean because I’m on an alcohol high, and I won’t wake up with the wine fear.
Despite all these benefits, I’m also very aware that I used alcohol to boost my confidence and mask my nerves. I will be dating as my true, authentic, unaltered, unaffected self. I won’t be able to neck a glass to settle my (very natural and appropriate) level of anxiety. Dating is scary, and I will need to embrace the butterfly’s in the stomach rather than wash them away with alcohol.
So here goes…
Soberfying 
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